Fear is a Lie.

If you’re anything like me, you are no stranger to fear. It accompanies big changes, decisions and unknowns. The “What If’s” can sometimes be too many to count.

There are dozens of verses throughout the Bible that tell us not to fear. But just hearing, “Don’t be afraid” doesn’t make fear any less real. It wasn’t until I realized why I shouldn’t be afraid that my fears began to disintegrate.

When we fear something and analyze all of the “What If’s” that could happen, we aren’t seeing the whole picture. Anytime I fear something, I am imagining a potential circumstance that is absent of God. His presence is not included in my “What If” scenario.

Fear is taking God out of the equation in a possible circumstance.

Fear is a lie. Because God will always be in every situation, any “What If” that I am fearing will never actually happen. That doesn’t mean bad things won’t happen. But God will always be there, walking with me through whatever comes my way.

Psalm 23 is a beautiful passage. After reading it and soaking in the truths of God in it, my fears tend to fall by the wayside.

Psalm 23

The Lord Is My Shepherd

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.

He makes me lie down in green pastures.

He leads me beside still waters.

He restores my soul.

He leads me in paths of righteousness

for his name's sake.

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil,

for you are with me;

your rod and your staff,

they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me

in the presence of my enemies;

you anoint my head with oil;

my cup overflows.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me

all the days of my life,

and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord

forever.

Isn’t God good?! This Psalm has so many beautiful truths about God that show us why we shouldn’t be afraid. It says that the Lord is our Shepherd. He leads us. He restores us. He is with us. He comforts us. He anoints us.

God is with us. This truth alone should give us reason enough to not be afraid!

So what are you afraid of? What are those “What If’s” you are tossing around?

It could be a big move, a job change, losing a relationship, disappointing someone, failing at something you’ve put a lot of effort into, losing a job, getting sick…the possibilities are endless!

But those things listed above are lies.

I’m not saying that they won’t happen. Any one of those could happen to anybody. But it is not the whole picture. Instead of just focusing on the “What if”, remember God in the equation.

What if you have a big move coming? But God is with you, and is already in that new place as well.

What if you have a job change? But God will go with you, and has a plan for you in this new job.

What if you lose a relationship? But God will never leave you.

What if you disappoint someone? But God already sees all that you are, and is not disappointed. He embraces you despite your shortcomings through Christ.

What if you fail at something? But God doesn’t expect perfection from you. Christ was perfection for you, so that you can have a relationship with God.

Any “What If” you are afraid of can be destroyed when you place “But God” after it. Instead of analyzing all the things that could go wrong, focus on the truth that God will always be with you, and is in control.

Fear is a lie.

My flesh and my heart may fail,

but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

Psalm 73:26

I Want My Future Husband to Love Someone Else More Than Me

Did anyone else grow up making lists of what they wanted in a future spouse?

Growing up in youth group, I was no stranger to girls Bible study and youth retreats. I remember at girls bible study we would discuss what traits were most important in a future husband. We were encouraged to write out a list of what we wanted, and then we would share it with each other.

We would always start out with the important ones… “He’s a Christian, he has a great family, he’s funny, respectful, he protects me, and my family likes him…”

And then some girls would trail off and include super specific things like hair color, eye color, height, and income.

We would make this super detailed list of what “The One” looks like, forming the perfect guy in our minds. But then we began dating, and realized that it’s not as cut-and-dry as carrying around a checklist and assessing each guy you meet.

The guys that we created on those checklists aren’t real people.

Real people are messy, sinful and beautiful. They struggle, laugh and cry. Marshall Segal wrote, “The search for a spouse isn’t a pursuit of perfection, but a mutually flawed pursuit of Jesus.”

With this in mind, what should we look for in a spouse?

I want my future husband to love someone else more than me.

I want him to be so in love with Jesus that his joy, hope and satisfaction is found in Christ alone. It will be my frequent prayer that he loves Jesus more than me.

In our culture today, we have created this idea of  “The One”. It raises our expectations for our spouse, and turns them into an idol. As talked about in a previous post, God created us to worship. And when we worship anything that isn’t God, it becomes an idol.

“A problem with worshiping these other things is that they never truly satisfy us, because we were created to only be satisfied by God Himself. So we worship those other things in hopes that they’ll make us happy. We place all of our worth, value and hope in something, and then it lets us down. It doesn’t satisfy, so then we just try to get more of that thing, hoping it actually satisfies the next time. And it becomes a viscous cycle of more.”

I don’t want my future husband to love me more than Christ, because I can’t fully satisfy him; only Christ can. His greatest joy is found in Christ, and so is mine.

So what are you looking for in a future spouse? Do they have to be 5’7’’, play guitar, make $100,000 salary and have blue eyes? Or are you looking for a mutually flawed person pursuing Jesus above everything else in their life? 

No Good Thing: God hears you. God knows you.

Do you ever feel far away from God?  Like God doesn’t care about your struggles? Like He is holding out on you?

Me too.

I wrote in the last post about how my basement recently flooded. We have now begun the process of packing up all of our belongings to move. Right now, the idea of home is just a memory that was quickly taken away after Christmas. Feelings of frustration, displacement and nostalgia have been so strong.

But then I read Psalm 84.

“For the Lord God is a sun and shield;

the Lord bestows favor and honor.

No good thing does he withhold

from those who walk uprightly.”

Psalm 84:11

No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly.

When I read this, my first thought is, “Really, God? You took away my home…that seemed like a pretty good thing.”

But as I lay down my selfish desires and seek the Lord’s heart, I realize that it is true. No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly.

Another way to look at it is, God will give the best thing possible to those who walk uprightly. There may be good things that you want that God isn’t giving you. This isn’t because He doesn’t care; it’s because that thing is not His best for you right now.

Israel went through a time of extreme hardship during their slavery to Egypt. They were constantly overworked and mistreated. But God was near to them.

“During those many days the king of Egypt died, and the people of Israel groaned because of their slavery and cried out for help. Their cry for rescue from slavery came up to God. And God heard their groaning, and God remembered his covenant with Abraham, with Isaac, and with Jacob. God saw the people of Israel—and God knew.” Exodus 2:23-25

God heard. God knew.

Isn’t that beautiful?

In the midst of our hardest trial, we often think that God doesn’t hear us. That He isn’t listening or even aware of what we’re going through.

But the same God that heard Israel’s cry of deliverance is hearing your cry too.

God hears you. God knows you. He withholds no good thing.

How do you feel like God is holding out on you? What is that good thing He isn’t giving you? Is it the job that you deserve? The health that you’ve been fighting for? That boy that you’ve been waiting to ask you to coffee? The comfort of a home to go to at night?

Whatever you’re crying out to God for, He hears you. And if He isn’t giving you that thing, then it is not His best for you.

That doesn’t make your circumstance any easier. But it does give a sense of peace in the storm.

Maybe God isn’t giving you what you’re praying for so that you’ll depend on Christ more than whatever you’re asking for. Growing closer to Christ is always best for you in any situation. So let your cry be for greater intimacy with Christ, within the storm you’re going through.

No good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly.

“He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all,

how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?”

Romans 8:32